Stuck on a Toilet Seat?

AP story last week about some guy suing Home Depot because, when using the toilet in a store in Kentucky, he found his ass glued to the seat. He's not suing because of the glue; he's suing because employees wouldn't take his cries for help seriously and the poor guy had to stay on the throne for a full fifteen minutes.

A couple of things scream BOGUS! in this story.

First is, who in his right mind would sit on a toilet seat in a public restroom without wiping the seat first?

You women might not know this--yeah, I guess you would--but rare is the man who, when pissing in a public toilet, will raise the seat. ALL public toilet seats in men's rooms are ALWAYS splattered with piss. Therefore, when forced to sit on one, what person would not wipe the seat first? And, if there were glue on the seat, he'd notice.

The next thing is, what kind of glue was it? Most quick-drying glues dry quickly. Most slow-drying glues dry slowly enough that it's hard to imagine someone sitting in it long enough to be glued to the seat.

I suppose the guy's story could be true. Perhaps the timing was perfect. Perhaps someone spread Crazy Glue of some kind on the seat immediately before this guy comes in, doesn't look at the seat, and sits down.

Perhaps the guy is from another planet and doesn't notice some clear, slimy looking gel on the seat.

But, even in Kentucky, I just can't imagine any man sitting on a public toilet seat without wiping it first.

Note to Home Depot lawyers: Even if the guy sticks (sorry) to his story, you can humiliate him sufficiently to make him want to forget the whole thing.