Airport Insecurity: "Opus" Has It Right
I hope you saw "Opus" in the comics last Sunday, September 11. It's a perfect illustration of how absolutely assinine passenger screening at airports is.
http://www.berkeleybreathed.com/images/thisweekstrip.jpg
A real-world illustration is what a uniformed airline pilot being positioned to another airport on a last-minute, one-way ticket goes through.
Because of a schedule change, after we landed at LAX and parked our airplane, we had to fly as passengers on another airline to SFO. Our company bought us e-tickets and gave us the access code over the phone.
We stood in line, got our boarding passes from the magic machines, checked our bags, and headed for the gate.
Because we were in uniform, the screeners assumed we were working and waved us to the head of the line where we stripped ourselves of metal down to our dental fillings, removed our shoes, and proceeded through the metal detector. The First Officer (copilot) went first, the Captain second, and I was last. Unfortunately, my boarding pass was visible, sticking out of my shirt pocket.
The FO had already put his shoes back on, gathered his bags, and left the screening area. The Captain and I were trapped. Because our tickets were coded for secondary screening--wanding, pat-down, detailed bag search--we had to undergo that farce while other passengers looked on with disbelief at a uniformed flight crew treated like vagrants being rousted by beat cops.
The screeners sort of apologized for the charade and said that, if they hadn't done this there, the airline folks would have had to do it at the gate when they saw the code on the boarding passes and noted that they hadn't been stamped by the screeners. They told us that, when we're traveling on a ticket to be sure to tell the screeners. I don't think so. Next time, it'll be folded in my pants pocket and out of sight.
But what of the FO? He'd escaped!
The Captain wanted us to tell the screeners that one of us had already gone through. I urged him to keep quiet, thinking they might shut down the entire section of the terminal while they searched the place for whatever bombs the FO might have planted. The Captain reasoned that, if the FO wasn't searched until we were boarding, he might miss the flight. I told him I didn't think the ticket-taker would even notice. We see what we expect to see.
The FO was waiting for us just beyond the screening area. We told him what had happened and he pointed out that it is illegal to return to the area after passing through it.
Our flight was boarding when we got to the gate. Each of us handed our boarding pass to the gate agent and went aboard. The agent didn't even blink.
The flight arrived safely. The FO didn't attempt to hijack the airplane, even though he'd not received the more thorough, secondary screening designed to further scrutinize the most suspicious passengers and make sure our manicure scissors have blunt points, not sharp ones.
No go back and read "Opus" again and tell me how safe you feel.
http://www.berkeleybreathed.com/images/thisweekstrip.jpg
A real-world illustration is what a uniformed airline pilot being positioned to another airport on a last-minute, one-way ticket goes through.
Because of a schedule change, after we landed at LAX and parked our airplane, we had to fly as passengers on another airline to SFO. Our company bought us e-tickets and gave us the access code over the phone.
We stood in line, got our boarding passes from the magic machines, checked our bags, and headed for the gate.
Because we were in uniform, the screeners assumed we were working and waved us to the head of the line where we stripped ourselves of metal down to our dental fillings, removed our shoes, and proceeded through the metal detector. The First Officer (copilot) went first, the Captain second, and I was last. Unfortunately, my boarding pass was visible, sticking out of my shirt pocket.
The FO had already put his shoes back on, gathered his bags, and left the screening area. The Captain and I were trapped. Because our tickets were coded for secondary screening--wanding, pat-down, detailed bag search--we had to undergo that farce while other passengers looked on with disbelief at a uniformed flight crew treated like vagrants being rousted by beat cops.
The screeners sort of apologized for the charade and said that, if they hadn't done this there, the airline folks would have had to do it at the gate when they saw the code on the boarding passes and noted that they hadn't been stamped by the screeners. They told us that, when we're traveling on a ticket to be sure to tell the screeners. I don't think so. Next time, it'll be folded in my pants pocket and out of sight.
But what of the FO? He'd escaped!
The Captain wanted us to tell the screeners that one of us had already gone through. I urged him to keep quiet, thinking they might shut down the entire section of the terminal while they searched the place for whatever bombs the FO might have planted. The Captain reasoned that, if the FO wasn't searched until we were boarding, he might miss the flight. I told him I didn't think the ticket-taker would even notice. We see what we expect to see.
The FO was waiting for us just beyond the screening area. We told him what had happened and he pointed out that it is illegal to return to the area after passing through it.
Our flight was boarding when we got to the gate. Each of us handed our boarding pass to the gate agent and went aboard. The agent didn't even blink.
The flight arrived safely. The FO didn't attempt to hijack the airplane, even though he'd not received the more thorough, secondary screening designed to further scrutinize the most suspicious passengers and make sure our manicure scissors have blunt points, not sharp ones.
No go back and read "Opus" again and tell me how safe you feel.
posted by Eric Rush | 2:28 PM
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1 comments
